I enjoy reading Eric Snider's movie reviews along with his other articles. Every once in awhile he posts what he calls "angry letters". It's probably my favorite thing he does. He inevitably has made fun of a Twilight movie or something and a teenage girl will write him a scathing email about how wrong and stupid he is. Then he proceeds to rip her apart to the delight of all. We all get bad reviews along with the good ones in iTunes, but every once in awhile there are just little angry gems that are such disproportionate responses to someone not liking our apps that I just have to laugh. I'm not sure if there is already a thread to share these little gems (I did try and search 1st) but I'll start off with one of my favorites. Targeted at a simple (intentionally childish) game we released called doodle golf, Grape-Lime writes: "This is so easy and childish that I wish this app never existed! DON'T GET IT! IT'S WEIRD AND FOR BABIES!! THE GOLF BALL IS STUPID!!! A TWO-YEAR-OLD MADE THIS!!!! I ONLY PLAYED ONE HOLE!!!!! " I could really pick that comment apart and point out how wonderfully incoherent it really is, but I'll leave it to it's own merits. Please share your favorite angry reviews here, preferably directed at your own apps but if you find a good one elsewhere, throw it in here for good measure. We all need to have a good sense of humor about not being able to please everyone all the time. I am floored by what consumers seem to think they are entitled to for $.99. How about you?
Maybe the golf ball is really stupid after all. Of course it can't be stupid, but if its behavior is such that it would insult the intelligence of a good portion of your target audience (including some smart kids who may have buyer's remorse) then such feedback could be useful if you're willing to see past the tantrum to some component of the experience that irked the customer.
to be honest i did like the game much either. but that's only because i expected it to be some awesome fun top down golf game. i certainly didnt post a stupid review like that though (in fact, i didnt leave one at all purely based on the fact it was nice of you to even offer it free in the first place)
Any review Kijib has ever written. http://itunes.apple.com/WebObjects/MZStore.woa/wa/viewUsersUserReviews?userProfileId=43873585
Johann, I like this topic, lots of great examples floating around. Caveman test was doing really well in Italy for a long time. Couldn't figure out why. Then I went to the page on the Italian store and then I understood why. The first two comments were so bad that people had to find out how something could get this nasty negative feedback. http://itunes.apple.com/it/app/caveman-test/id339056870?mt=8 My Italian is good enough to understand that you can't describe an app any worse. I actually was able to track down the first guy( he had some questions) and asked him why he was so angry with "Caveman Test" He played over 50 games and was never able to beat Ufkah. So I emailed him back explaining to him that it wasn't the games fault that he wasn't good enough to beat the caveman. Immediately after that the second nasty review appeared. It is really funny how many apps have terrible reviews that are selling really well.
This is the one that really puzzles me right now: http://itunes.apple.com/us/app/mirror-for-ipod-and-iphone/id359511476?mt=8 You have to read about 75 reviews before you hit one that isn't a 1-star review. #23 paid app on the store, #1 Lifestyle What gives?
Wow this guy expects long games like if he was on a console and just wants everything updated lol Epic Fail..
Wait this is really a review someone left? Brilliant, this is the kinda crazy I am talking about. It's so delightful. Kijib's review are hilarious. With all those caps and exclamation marks I imagine him just constantly yelling in his day to day life. "SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS MAMN!!!!!!!!!!" at a funeral and such. good stuff.
I LOVE reading the reviews that say This sucks, update and I'll give you 1 more star! Honestly, WHO CARES?!?!? I read the comments now instead of FML/MLIA/etc.
I'm sick of the strange/bad reviews from people. I'm going to make a game that has no graphics, no sounds, no controls. They will have nothing to complain about. It will be called 'flashlight'.
Italian reviewers are so bad! Besides the stupid comments, lots of times they can't even spell well their own language. I'm really ashamed of my own country sometimes.