Games my 3-year-old cousin sucks at

Discussion in 'General Game Discussion and Questions' started by MisterDrgn, Dec 20, 2010.

  1. MisterDrgn

    MisterDrgn Well-Known Member

    Mar 14, 2009
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    So I just spent an hour entertaining my 3.5-year-old cousin with iPhone games. It was pretty fun, actually. However, to be honest, she wasn't very good at them. She'd play one for half a minute, totally suck at it, and then inform me that we should play something else. Anyway, in case anyone out there is looking for child-friendly games, I thought I'd post this helpful list of games not to try.

    Games my 3.5-year-old cousin sucks at:

    Doodle Jump
    --She died pretty much instantly on this. It was really sad. She's reasonably smart (for a tiny person), and I think she got that she had to tilt the iPhone to play, but tilting only a small amount just doesn't compute. She put in about 20 seconds on this.

    Blue Hole
    --Same story. I even tried telling her what to do ("Go left! Now right! No, RIGHT!!"). She could avoid an obstacle or two at most, and that was it.

    Nanoids
    --She actually kinda got this, which is probably a testament to how intuitive the shoot-em-up control schemes tend to be. However, she lost interest in about 10 seconds and told me I had to play. Are you kidding? If I'm gonna play a shoot-em-up, it sure isn't gonna be Nanoids...

    Huje Tower
    --Honestly, neither of us could figure out how to play this game. World of Goo it ain't.

    Cowabunga
    --Total fail.

    Doodle God
    --TOTAL fail.

    Chop Chop Runner
    --Okay, she killed like a couple guys, but it was a total accident.

    Action Buggy
    --What part of "don't hit the rocks" is so hard to understand? Actually, she got the idea of pressing "jump" when an obstacle approaches, but not holding down "jump" to get farther. I think her top score was like 3. On the plus side, she did get fairly good at pressing the buttons to start a new a game after dying (btw, no game like this should require 3 button presses to start a new game).

    Okay, and now a few games she didn't totally suck at:

    Uno
    --She actually won a game of Uno! Well, she took the credit, but I think I helped considerably. She never really got the whole turn-taking thing, but matching colors worked fairly well (even matching numbers worked...sorta).

    Mushihimesama Bug Panic
    --She actually beat the first level. I mean, I took out the first set of bugs, which are the only ones you need to kill on the first level. But she kinda got the movement part down. Again, there was a problem with realizing she should keep her finger held down, instead of just making small motions.

    Pocket God
    --This actually kept her occupied for a while, even though she mostly just tilted the screen to push them off the island and then hit "plus" to get more. She did manage to harpoon a few in the underwater level and hit a bird with lightning (I helped with switching between locations). Honestly, I was kinda relieved when she eventually lost interest because it occurred to me that it wasn't the best kinda game to be showing a little kid...

    That's about all I remember. Maybe next time I'll come better prepared?
     
  2. LBG

    LBG SeƱor Member

    Apr 19, 2009
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    nada ilegal
    31.560499, -111.904128
    Erm, I'm pretty sure most 3-year-olds suck at games. I know I did.
     
  3. Cilo

    Cilo Well-Known Member

    Feb 2, 2010
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    One word, Alphabetic - they'll be entertained for hours.
     
  4. swishinj

    swishinj Well-Known Member

    Aug 3, 2009
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    CEO at Apple Inc.
    #317
    Thanks for sharing.
     
  5. crex

    crex Doctor of Game of the Week-ology

    Oct 18, 2010
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    Everywhere and Nowhere
    I'm pretty sure 3(.5) year olds can't play games yet.
     
  6. Sainter

    Sainter Well-Known Member

    Dec 8, 2008
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    Get your cousin onto Zombie Infection next time you see her. Endless hours of fun for the little ones :)
     
  7. ArtNJ

    ArtNJ Well-Known Member

    Jul 13, 2009
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    Action buggy?? Seriously? I mean come on, that thing is HARD, I play it for like 45 seconds. You obviously need a game that really feels like it starts TOO easy for adults.

    My five year old is just as good as I am at doodle jump, so that wasnt unreasonable to try.

    That said, 3 is really young to be playing most games designed for adults. Kind of silly to be posting a list of games they cant play...at 3 the issue is what can they play?

    Try untimed match 3 games. Bejeweled classic perhaps.

    Face fighter should be a hit.
     
  8. heavy liquid

    heavy liquid Well-Known Member

    May 17, 2010
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    My 3.5 year old loves Cut The Rope and is fairly good at it.

    I think he just really likes the character and his little animations like when he points to his mouth or rings the bell (in the Christmas version). Although he does get frustrated when he can't get all three stars -- which is almost always except for the first few boards.
     
  9. Booch138

    Booch138 Well-Known Member

    Apr 28, 2009
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    Data-Entry Operator
    Coolidge, AZ
    This thread is so full of win.

    Come on she should be playing at a f*cking Fallout 3 level already guys.
     
  10. lord-sam

    lord-sam Well-Known Member

    Feb 25, 2009
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    Have you got her checked out by a doctor? Because my 3 year old is on the leaderboards for Doodle Jump, Minigore... All that.


    (all lies)
     

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