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Help improve game description and pictures

09-15-2011, 01:54 PM
Joined: May 2010
Location: Germany
Posts: 76
Help improve game description and pictures

Hello other developers,

my new game Smash A Foe has just been released...

Now I wanted to ask you, if you can tell me, if I the game description and the game pictures in the App Store should be improved? The problem is, that I am not a native english-speaker. I had someone, overlooking the texts, but I am not really sure, if the content really reflects, what the game is.

I am happy about every tip from you.

Thank you very much!


Here is the link to the App-Store:

09-16-2011, 11:50 AM
Joined: Sep 2011
Location: Toronto, Canada
Posts: 19
One Tip

Cool game. I think the camera feature is really neat feature.

Just one tip though: I think you should highlight the camera feature in your first (or even second) line of the description. When I first skimmed your description, because I didn't see anything about the camera in the name or in the first line, I almost missed it.

Good luck on your app!
09-23-2011, 02:54 PM
Joined: May 2010
Location: Germany
Posts: 76

thanks for feedback, I have adjusted the screenshots to give a better impression about the game and described the features there...

What do you think?
09-23-2011, 06:50 PM
Hey laxaris,

A few things:
  1. The first app screenshot should be an action shot, rather than something showing you how to set up the face for smashing.
  2. The grammar on the red banner in the bottom right is wrong. It should read "Use the iPhone camera to capture your friend's face!"
  3. Put the Crash/Bug thing at the end of the description
  4. Change the tagline, it makes no sense. "The World Is Yours" is for a strategy game, not a face smashing game. Instead, say "Frustrated by your enemy, boss, or spouse? Smash em!"
  5. The description could use some cleanup as well. For the initial paragraph, just talk about the joy of smashing your foe. For the Game Description paragraph, you should stick to bullet points like "very easy to learn!" "Smash your foes!"

Hope this helps.

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