This is probably the worst I received: Wow ★ by An idiot who bought this app - Version 1.2 - Mar 25, 2012 Don't pay for this, I made the mistake and it realized it only after opening it, so dumb Although this one wins points for being frustrating: Rubbish ★ by Ultimate295 - Version 1.2 - May 7, 2012 This app doesn't flaming work since the stupid update they did. Can you sort it out!!!!!???? They never used the support link, so I have no idea what happened. Ironically, that updated added tools to correct corruption issues.
We had 57 five star reviews in a row on the US store (no other reviews), when we got this guy: ---------- Hahaha ★☆☆☆☆ Developers will call this a piece of art. Casual games (app store population) on the other hand, will say this is boring! ---------- At least the first sentence is nice
So glad you guys are taking off with Pangolin, I love it! I really like the mixed ratings with either 5 or 1 star that go something like: "It's OK game... I don't like the gameplay, not fun... graphics are awesome... I really love this!" It's like they are rating 3 games at once Anyway: * Bad by Ricardoiscool303230 on Friday, January 04 2013 version 2.3.2 Bad Merciless and to the point
This is one of my favourite 1 star reviews of Retro Racing... Great game...if you like bad games. Well when I first encountered the app download I was skeptical, and I was right to be. This just so happens to be one of the worst games you could possibly download onto your apple device. The graphics of this game are extremely sub-par to be blunt. It looks to be done on paint, and to ask someone to pay for something an average eight year old could make is just criminal. The menus of the game are extremely difficult to navigate even on the large screen of the iPad. The gameplay itself is the worst part of the 69 pence asking fee. It is truly abysmal and a disgrace to all of the hard work and effort that the apple designers put into making the iPad, iPhone and indeed the iPod touch. To sum up my review of this appalling game in a few short sentences. It has to be the worst thing to ever grace the apple community since Bill Gates. It cannot get any worse than it is now. So if you are on the app store looking for the worst game to buy. Go for this one because that is the one thing it will not let you down on.
Haha, great thread. In Beast Boxing 3D's 2+ years on the app store, I have received some really, uhh... interesting... reviews. My favorite "Lite" 3-level version review: Awesome... But short. It was a great fame but really short! I beat it in 30min. Make it longer! And this was the cutest critical review on the full game I could have possibly received: I was embarrassed I'm a boy I had fun with this game and i thought the character was a boy and I finally finished then I realized it was a girl I got so embarrassed I deleted the app this is like when you found out metroid is a girl I'm pretty sure it was a little boy borrowing their mom's phone, which made me like it even more.
One star reviews with no comments are the worst. I keep asking myself why, why do they hate my game so much?
Wow that is so cruel. Some people just don't understand the premise of retro gaming the ignorant fools. To go to such extremes to shoot an arrow in the knee of a developer like that.. He must be going though some stuff and taking it out on the wrong person. Sometimes I go to the AppStore to write a negative review but in the time it takes to load up the AppStore I think about the dudes life, his family, his financial situation and his feelings and instead end up rating it 5 stars and giving it a good review. I'm a sook. I just can't help it. It's probably not good though. Some devs like constructive criticism and I often just rave on about how it's the best game I've ever played even when it's not. I don't do that anymore though, I just follow the service my mother gave me, if you can't say anything nice don't say anything at all.. So now I only rate apps I absolutely love. Are you the developer of qwak? Because that game is the best game I've ever played, in a legitimate sense not sympathetically. There need to be more oldskool retro games. Qwak is the only game I've played on iOS that makes me feel like I'm playing nes or sega. Even more than sonic. Bet the reviewer is a new generation gamer and has never played anything like nes, probably grew up on 3d gaming.
This was a nice one for my very first app Spare Change. waste - waste of money, time, space, battery life, waste of d****d near everything
Two star review: The guy got it for free, so cut me some slack.. It also bit me because I've got a full time job so I haven't got the time to work on my apps 40+ hours a week. I'm happy if I can make 12. It did trigger me to look into the changes needed for iPhone 5 support. Getting more reviews like that would maybe prevent people from buying so it kinda forced me to do the update. Overall the game has an average of 4.5 stars derived from 250+ ratings so apparently it's pretty good.
First review for Dangerous at Amazon Android app store. I want to frame this someday: Horibles and Dumb-Heads, March 22, 2012 By Toni Wright "TONI WRIGHT" (broken arrow,OK) Who would get this?Its horibble!Don't get it! This is the stupidest game ever!Go go go go go away stupid video game! And this review site actually finished the game in a Destroyer class ship, just about the second weakest ship in the game, but has the gall to complain that he was two-shotted at times. Not to mention the unprofessional tone: http://truepcgaming.com/2012/09/07/dangerous-pc-review/
that's my favorite! he gave us 5 stars after all, but the review he started with was...amazingly funny. two words: anger management.
Reading through this I thought I'd just make a small point. Yes I did only ever play the Xbox and ps2 era games but even with no nostalgia I really like the retro games and think that people like this give us young people a bad name.
Our game's on Android so plenty of choice. I think this is my favourite though, you can read soooo much into that one short sentence...
I will contribute and quote one of my worst comment for Jetpack High Android: ... a game were you simply have to pay real money to even get off the ground... a game made by chimps that chimps wouldn't play. Why do abysmal games even have to get 1 star!!! Thank you guy!
I've yet to release my game but I have plenty of other apps and I would say the worst is when you get a review where the user didn't read the description or even bother to look at the screenshots and then complians that the app doesn't do what they want. A little tip for devs: since we can't contact users (apple does not give us that info) you can usually find an email address by typing the user name into google and doing some investigating. I always try to send an email apologizing and offering to walk them through the refund process. This usually cools down people a bit and once they respond I will ask what in my description or screen shots made you think my app did or didn't do that so I can change it and no other users get "tricked". They usually have no response but it's kind of funny to put them in their place.
